Let me start by saying, I in NO way think any less of women and mothers who wear makeup regularly. This article is about a personal choice I have made, not one that I am forcing onto others.
Growing up I thought my mother was beautiful. I still do. I remember being confused when she refused to go in public without putting her makeup on. My Mother wore hardly any makeup. Concealer under her eyes and a little bit of blush. As a child, I couldn’t even tell the difference between her with make up and without. She always told me she felt better about herself when she wore it. I thought it was strange… as an adult, I understand. I think that women should do whatever they need to do to feel more confident in themselves.
That being said, I hate that we depend on makeup for that confidence boost. Society has made us believe we should be working 40 hours a week, taking care of the kids, cleaning, cooking, and doing all this in heels and lipstick. Our lives are too busy to get the recommended amount of sleep, but heaven forbid we have bags under our eyes.
I’ve never worn much makeup. I wish I could say it was because I’m a confident person. But I’m not. It’s because I’m not good at applying makeup. But even though I wasn’t good at putting it on and I didn’t wear a lot of it, it has always made me feel better about myself.
I stopped wearing makeup on accident. When pregnant with Lucille I was sick so often that putting makeup on became pointless. It just meant I would have to wash it off in 30 minutes after I got sick again. Then after the kids came I was just too busy for it.
Lately I’ve started taking back some “me time”. Taking walks, writing for my blog, doing things that make me feel like more than just a Mom. I thought “Yes! I’m going to start wearing makeup again! That’ll make me feel like more than just a Mom. That’ll make me feel pretty! Maybe I’ll have someone teach me how to do my makeup better so I can wear more of it!” I was excited.
But then I remembered being young. Not understanding why my beautiful Mom needed to put makeup on before she’d let people see her. Children think their Mothers are beautiful, no matter how they look. They see the beauty in their hearts and don’t focus on physical imperfections, freckles, short eyelashes, etc. The real beauty that makes a person.
I want my daughter to have realistic expectations of what women look like and what makes them beautiful. I want my son to have realistic expectations of what women look like and what makes them beautiful. I want them to know that what is on the outside doesn’t matter, but what’s on the inside means everything. I want Lucille to be confident in herself without layering on foundation and eye shadow, blush and mascara. I want Lennon to make his future wife feel confident and comfortable enough in her own skin to shed the makeup.
So I have chosen to not wear makeup. And this time on purpose. Not because I think I’m more beautiful without it, but because I want my kids to think that. And I think if I don’t use makeup as a crutch, I’ll someday learn to see myself through their eyes.